Lara M
Intimacy and Relationship
May 17th 2009 07:30
Intimacy and Relationship
Is it unreasonable to ask a (potential) partner to get tested?
Building and maintaining intimacy in a relationship used to take a lot longer in the *old days*. These days getting intimate can happen as quickly as a couple of hours!
For many people, ‘lovemaking’ is a sense of intimacy and emotional closeness – as it involves trust among other emotions. However, for just as many people, that same act of intimacy is just a random act of fun and spontaneous desire (and unprotected sex).
Sexually transmissible infections (STIs) are not only common but on the rise, with most infecting individuals without any known symptoms. Which brings me to the point of this post…is it unreasonable to ask a (potential) partner to get tested?
My friend B was recently asked –by a girl he had a few dates with– to get tested. “Gees, we’ve only just started dating! Surely she can’t be serious…have to get tested?!, he exclaimed. Well, he certainly didn’t think it was too soon for them to get intimate…so why the astonishment over having to get tested?
Is it because she was *bold* enough to ask? Is it because it’s not something that people (usually) do before getting intimate? Is it because he thinks that ‘Hey, I’m resilient…I can’t have any STIs (eventhough I was not *safe* just once...).’
Whatever it is, I hope that many more of us are bold, responsible and love herself/himself enough to ask to be tested – like B’s ex was.
Sure, the test result(s) may not immediately show signs of any STIs but it can however provide some idea of previous high-risk sexual behavior, as well as educate on safe sex and sexual health. You wouldn’t cross the road without looking, so why risk getting an STI?
Is it unreasonable to ask a (potential) partner to get tested?
Building and maintaining intimacy in a relationship used to take a lot longer in the *old days*. These days getting intimate can happen as quickly as a couple of hours!
For many people, ‘lovemaking’ is a sense of intimacy and emotional closeness – as it involves trust among other emotions. However, for just as many people, that same act of intimacy is just a random act of fun and spontaneous desire (and unprotected sex).
Safe Sex Saves Lives
Sexually transmissible infections (STIs) are not only common but on the rise, with most infecting individuals without any known symptoms. Which brings me to the point of this post…is it unreasonable to ask a (potential) partner to get tested?
My friend B was recently asked –by a girl he had a few dates with– to get tested. “Gees, we’ve only just started dating! Surely she can’t be serious…have to get tested?!, he exclaimed. Well, he certainly didn’t think it was too soon for them to get intimate…so why the astonishment over having to get tested?
Is it because she was *bold* enough to ask? Is it because it’s not something that people (usually) do before getting intimate? Is it because he thinks that ‘Hey, I’m resilient…I can’t have any STIs (eventhough I was not *safe* just once...).’
Whatever it is, I hope that many more of us are bold, responsible and love herself/himself enough to ask to be tested – like B’s ex was.
Sure, the test result(s) may not immediately show signs of any STIs but it can however provide some idea of previous high-risk sexual behavior, as well as educate on safe sex and sexual health. You wouldn’t cross the road without looking, so why risk getting an STI?
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