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Too Long a Wait, Too Far Away...

October 11th 2008 01:58
Is it ever too long a wait or too far away?
What does it take to hold a relationship together?

jail-prison-lovegone-auschwitz-lovedied


Situation…

While on a trip abroad, your husband/wife unexpectedly lands in jail – as far as you know there was no maliciousness on his/her part, though the courts (obviously) thought differently... S/he is currently serving an eight-year jail term.


jail prison love-gone Auschwitz love-died


You’re about a day’s flight away from where s/he is, but it’s one of the most expensive cities in the world. Due to tight financial circumstances you’ve been unable to visit him/her. Except for phone calls you have not seen each other for more than three years now.
jail prison Michel-Gagnon breakup lovegone


You’re starting to have a change of heart/feelings for both the person and the relationship. What should you do?

love gone died broken relationship breakup

Is it ever too long a wait or too far way?
What does it say about the relationship?



Images (in order) courtesy of Alvimann, Pumpkin, Michel Gagnon and holder.

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Comments
4 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by katyzzz

October 11th 2008 02:29
Give him the flick, unless you honestly believe he is innocent, who needs a jailbird, not me.

Who, in their right mine would, women can be very foolish and men are wonderful manipulators of the female condition.

Comment by Lara M

October 11th 2008 02:54
...women can be very foolish and men are wonderful manipulators of the female condition.
...I think it can be vice versa too, katyzzz. Perhaps not in this case but in other cases.

Sorry if I was a bit too vague..
The details of the situation -- which I had chosen to leave out 'cos I didn't think it was that important, since I was questioning the 'till death do us part aspect' of the marriage/relationship -- are:

It's actually (my friend) Pat's friend's wife. She is/was a fashion merchandiser and had in hand some merchandise samples which were unfortunately tainted with drugs. She was travelling with her business partner who conveniently disappeared as she was apprehended!



Comment by Michaelie

October 11th 2008 05:11
Distance - physical, or just the constraints of life/time/a demanding job - always takes its toll, no matter the circumstances, I think.

You could say - it's easy, both parties have promised, til death do us part, but that isn't the case in what is almost the majority of marriages now, so why should it hold just because there may be an element of guilt?

I think that's what it comes down to. Guilt, and obligation. You can't use any normal excuse - s/he doesn't help me around the house, is having an affair, won't agree to have a baby - because of the singularity of the circumstances.

By the end of it, you may be over it - distance will have worked itself between you more than just the miles that separate you, so you will either get out, or stay because you feel you have to.

But I'm sure there are many exceptions to this, of blissful love burning strong throughout the ages despite all encumberances and barriers.



Mich

Comment by Lara M

November 14th 2008 10:39
Distance - physical, or just the constraints of life/time/a demanding job - always takes its toll, no matter the circumstances, I think.
...agree with you, Mich.

Too often, one partner or both gets too self-centered and there it goes... One can stay in a relationship out of obligation (and be unhappy) or leave the relationship (and be happy), but it's the guilt that *kills* I reckon.

Thanks for your thoughts.

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